The Worst Thing Is Not the Last Thing

David Burns on March 30, 2018

In advance of Easter Sunday, I’d like to share an additional selection from my new book Unafraid: Living with Courage and Hope in Uncertain Times. With Easter quickly approaching, it seems an especially appropriate time to reflect on mortality, the afterlife, and the idea of facing our greatest fears with hope, strength, and courage. The manuscript for Unafraid was completed last fall. Among the people who inspired me most in how he faced illness and the possibility of death, unafraid, was Rev. Allen Zugelter. We spoke on several occasions about facing death in the light of Easter. Allen passed a couple of months ago, but gave me permission to share his story in the book before he passed. I shared this passage at his graveside service last month. As a pastor, I’ve made hundreds of hospital calls and sat in the homes of hundreds of people facing frightening diagnoses. I’ve prayed with and cared for people battling cancer. Most survived; for others, their situations were terminal. I’ve been to visit the dying at our area hospice palliative care center. I’ve cared for a half-dozen people who faced lengthy battles with ALS. I’ve been moved and inspired by so many of these people, learning from them how they faced illness with courage and hope. I’d like to share one of their stories with you. Allen is thirty-eight and waging a battle with leukemia that he may not win. He’s hoping to be accepted for one final experimental trial that appears to be his last hope for medical treatment. Allen began his career as a lawyer and had a bright future ahead of him. That’s when I first met him and eventually became his pastor. Several years later, he began to feel a call to ordained ministry. His wife was supportive, and Allen went to seminary and eventually was ordained as a United Methodist pastor. He was serving a large congregation in a northern suburb of Kansas City when he received his diagnosis. Allen noted the three types of fear he’s dealt with: the fear of death, the fear of pain, and the fear for his family. He was afraid not only about the emotional impact his death would have on his parents and his wife, Ashley, but also about mundane things like how his wife would deal with their finances after his death. “There are so many things I can’t control,” he said, “but I have been able to work on an estate plan and sought to make things as easy as possible on Ashley in the event of my death.” His call several months ago asking me to preach his funeral was an example of his making preparations so that Ashley wouldn’t have to. He spoke with his doctors about his fear of pain; they assured him that they could effectively control it with the pain meds currently available. That was reassuring to him. But when it came to the fear of death, he told me that he simply did not feel afraid. “Years ago I came to accept that we are mortal creatures, that we are going to die,” he said. “We have no guarantees, Adam, as to how long we’ll live. Being human means we’re going to die. My faith has played a huge part in eliminating the fear of sickness and death. As you’ve taught us, and Frederick Buechner before you, because of Jesus Christ, the worst thing is not the last thing. My faith in him changed everything on this front. Because of his death and resurrection, I am not afraid to die.” This sounded an awfully lot like facing our fears with faith, and releasing our worries and cares to God. Allen told me that among the things that had brought him peace were prayer and meditation. “I have not set aside time to pray—my entire existence is becoming an ongo­ing prayer, a conversation and togetherness with God that has resulted in a peace that continues to grow.” Here’s the lesson I want you to take away from Allen’s story: You likely will have some fear if you are ever diagnosed with a serious illness, but that fear doesn’t need to control you. It is possible to face even the most frightening of illnesses with courage and hope. Allen was able to come to a place where he accepted his mortality, recognizing that none of us knows how long we’ll live. He gratefully accepted each day as a gift, and sought to live it as fully as he could. Allen controlled what he could control, and found it helpful to take action where possible. And, ultimately, he found peace in releasing his worry, fear, anxiety, and very existence to God. This is just a brief excerpt from Chapter Eighteen of my new book, Unafraid: Living with Courage and Hope in Uncertain Times. In the rest of the chapter I further explore the topic of approaching health-related anxieties with courage and hope. If you would like to learn more about Unafraid or the children, youth or adult small group study resources based upon it, please click here. (Scroll to the bottom of the page to view the downloadable resources and the promo videos for Unafraid.)  

The Picture of Death Defeated

David Burns on March 28, 2018

In advance of Easter Sunday, I’d like to share a selection from my new book Unafraid: Living with Courage and Hope in Uncertain Times. With Easter quickly approaching, it seems especially appropriate that we reflect on the resurrection and the afterlife, and the idea of facing our greatest fears with hope, strength, and courage. Please stay tuned for more updates about Unafraid! Christianity proclaims that God’s response to our fear of death is the death and resurrection of Christ. Through his death and resurrection, Jesus conquered death. His resurrection leads us to say that evil, illness, sin, and death will never have the final word. There is always hope. The Easter following Muhammad Ali’s death, I was trying to give my congregation a picture or analogy of how Easter conveys the idea of a powerful victory over death itself. I reminded them of Ali’s epic fight with Sonny Liston on May 25, 1965. It was a rematch, following Ali’s surprise defeat of the former heavyweight champion the year before. Many people had dismissed Ali’s first victory over Liston as a fluke. But in the first round of this rematch, the twenty-three-year-old Ali knocked Liston down for the count. Perhaps you’ve seen the iconic photograph of Ali standing over Liston shouting, “Get up and fight, sucker!” That’s the image I have in my mind of Christ’s defeat of death itself at Easter. His resurrection gives us hope that hatred, evil, illness, sin, and death will never have the final word. There is always hope, not only in this life but also in the next. It was C. S. Lewis who once said that what we believe about death and the afterlife fundamentally changes how we live this life. If I believe that the Gospel writers and the apostles were telling the truth, and that Jesus died and rose again (as astounding as that may seem), and if I trust the words of Jesus himself about death and the afterlife, then I can face all of life, including every fear I describe in Unafraid, with courage and hope. Now, for some, a belief in the resurrection and eternal life leads to indifference about what happens on earth. I’ve heard some Christians speak as though they don’t have to care about the suffering of others, for if those in extreme poverty die, they “get to go to heaven.” I once heard a woman say that she didn’t worry about the environment or any other temporal concerns because “this world is not my home.” This is a gross misreading of the Gospels. It was Jesus who called us to care for the hungry, the thirsting, the naked, the sick, the immigrant, and the prisoner. And it was he who said that if we’ve been indifferent to the needs of our fellow human beings in this life, we’ll have no part with him in the next one. Again, Jesus’s focus was not on heaven—it was on how we live here on earth. The promise of life beyond death shouldn’t make us indifferent to the suffering of others; rather, it should lead us to great courage and risk-taking in addressing the pain and anguish in this world. This is just a brief excerpt from Chapter Nineteen of my new book, Unafraid: Living with Courage and Hope in Uncertain Times. In the rest of the chapter, I consider how we can live life well, knowing that death could come at any time, and how we can face each day without fear, but instead with courage and hope. If you would like to learn more about Unafraid or the children, youth or adult small group study resources based upon it, please click here. (Scroll to the bottom of the page to view the downloadable resources and the promo videos for Unafraid.)